Dear Aly’s “Birthmom”

Dear Aly’s “Birthmom,”

This is how you are referred to in Aly and Josh Taylor’s blog, but you are not “their” birthmom. You don’t belong to them. You are Genevieve’s first mother. You are also the mother to the little girl you just gave birth to. Please don’t let anyone tell you any different.

I have been scouring the Internet all day trying to figure out who you are, how to extend my hand in support of you and your little girl.

I have seen countless comments about how it is God’s plan for your child not to be with you and instead go to Aly and Josh. I have seen the adoption community, adoptees and birthmoms alike, offer you the help you need to parent your baby.

All those comments were deleted by the Taylors. I can only assume they don’t want you to find the support you need to parent your baby because it would interfere with their desire to have her.

I’ve seen people blasting your personal information all over social media, claiming you are an unfit mother, that your older children are in foster care. Because I have been scouring the Internet all day trying to find you I have also read a good portion of the blog, Aly’s Fight. Because of this I know that your children are not in foster care and there is nothing to suggest you are not a safe and fit mother. Perhaps you have fallen on hard times, but why else would anyone ever consider relinquishing their children?

I cannot find your name and this is my last ditch attempt to get a message to you. (Remember, all our offers of help have been systematically removed on any public forum by Aly & Josh)

I cannot find you quick enough. You wanted to keep Genevieve and were coerced to believe you were not good enough. You found the courage to stand up and say you will not give this baby up and I fear that you will, again, be beaten down.

How hard is it knowing that the people who hold all the power to entirely cut you out of Genevieve’s life want the new baby that you don’t want to give them? I know exactly how hard it is because I was once in your shoes. And I kept that next baby. Because of it I was cut out of my daughter’s life.

But she returned to me. On her own. And she has listened to MY story. The story that was withheld from her. They didn’t get the next baby, and they tried to eliminate me from the first one’s life. They failed.

Please, whatever your name is, whoever you may be, PLEASE contact me. All the support you need is just a click away. I promise you. God’s will is for your daughter to have her mommy and for you to be the mommy as He intended you to be.

No one is entitled to your child. NO ONE. YOU are her mother. You always were, you always will be.

Dear Aly’s “birthmother,”

Please find this post.

Sincerely,

A very concerned first mom.

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10 thoughts on “Dear Aly’s “Birthmom”

  1. Pingback: Dear Aly’s “Birthmom” | Adoption & Birth Mothers*

  2. The entitlement. Its appalling. That they would take another woman’s child, actually pray to separate a family when they have the chance to be ‘Christ-like’ and offer to keep them together. People like this are nothing but hypocrites.

    I hope this first mom finds this, and we can help her stop being preyed upon and provide the help she needs to believe in herself, to believe that God doesn’t make mistakes. He intended her to be this child’s mother.

    Great job at reaching out. Much love for your compassionate heart and soul. So happy to call you my friend.

    Liked by 4 people

  3. Everytime, I read an article, response that has God attached to it. Makes me angry. People are people first before any belief. A baby always belongs with there, Mom. I was once very weak, that day taught me to always fight. I searched 30 years to find my stolen daughter. Lawyers, get more rich, the real mom, gets more depressed and sad. Through out there entire lives, they missed out, on it all. They cry a silent cry, within there broken heart. That’s that reality, the truth!

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Adoption can be a beautiful, wonderful option for all parties involved. That doesn’t make it ever a set in stone thing, or something that should be forced or coerced. In the 19th and first half of the 20th century, so many single mothers were forced to give up their children in secret and many have gone to their graves never knowing a thing about a child they may not have wanted to put up for adoption because there was simply no support provided. It’s absolutely disturbing how set on taking this child that family is – if they were TRULY called by some deity to help this mother and baby, would they not also want to help make sure she gets the support she needs to raise a child she wishes to keep? Why is it that their god only supposedly works on their side, but not on the side of the birth mom – and why is there such a push to pray to said god that this woman give up a child she wants? And to blame that choice on hormones – it’s no better than blaming a woman’s mood on where she is in her monthly cycle. It’s cruel, it’s demeaning, it’s anti-feminist, and it’s anti-woman. If a woman has a choice and people want adoption to continue to be a viable option, they MUST stop preying on those who have chosen to put a child up for adoption previously and start supporting a parent no matter what. This is bullying, pure and simple.

    FIRST MOM, if you are out there, PLEASE reach out. There ARE those who want to help you if you wish to keep your baby. There are those who want to make sure you get the support you need. There are those who think the choice you make is right and that it is a choice ONLY YOU CAN MAKE, regardless of what you are being told on your end.

    This is so heartbreaking.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sorry, but adoption is never a “beautiful, wonderful” option for anything but the adopters. It’s is always a traumatic option for the baby. Foster adoptions where the kids want to be adopted may be the closest to “wonderful”, but it’s still horrible and heartbreaking they ended up there to begin with.

      Liked by 2 people

  5. I’m an adoptive mom. Their post asking for prayers, referring to the child as theirs, saying she must realise the child is theirs..NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! It’s all wrong.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Dear Aly’s birthmom. I wrote this post on the potential adopters page and it was immediately deleted and I was immediately blocked. This right here darling will show you how selfish these people are. “So you are raising money to help these twins’ poor mother be able to raise her own babies? I would hate to think you want to separate a mother from her children. After all we all know when a woman becomes pregnant it means God has chosen her to be a mommy. I’m sure a person like yourself would not want to give anymore money to America’s multibillion dollar adoption industry that is less regulated than the real estate industry and continues to support the discrimination of adoptees; unless you’re unfortunately the type to put your selfish needs first and think Black people should sit on the back of the bus and not be allowed into White movie theatres and other forms of discrimination because hey if you support adoption agencies and their blatant discrimination surely you support all types. Oh no, surely that wouldn’t be someone like yourself dear.”

    Liked by 2 people

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