..pink bundle, perfect, beautiful, needing me, wanting me, all you need.. ..self-hating, worthless, lies I tell myself, that I believe, can’t see, truth.. ..society doesn’t want me to be, judgment and words that cut me, help me cut you.. ..out of my life.. ..forever severed.. ..stranger in the crowd, faceless child of … Continue reading Sincerely Yours No More
Tag: grief
How can one be a mother yet not a mother at the same time? How can one be a daughter yet an orphan all at once at never at all? How can we walk that line of in-between and straddle both worlds of decadent joy and pure loss? . Mother's Day is complicated and almost … Continue reading Our Mother’s Day Mosaic
As my relinquished daughter gets older it's become more difficult to keep up with personal updates in regards to my adoption story. The older she gets, the more I realize that it isn't just my story to tell and I have become conflicted about just what to share and what to keep private. I see … Continue reading The Adoption Rollercoaster: Reunion?
I'm sure, by now, I'm loathed by most who have found themselves in my corner of the world wide Web via an innocent Google search about how to adopt a baby. That's okay. I get it. My writing is blunt and I don't mince words. I'd like to take some time, however, to speak directly … Continue reading Dear Hoping to Adopt
The following is a chapter from the book I am writing, "Whispers of Grace." The months following the relinquishment of IKL I had the same nightmare frequently. I still have this nightmare once in a great while. Most of the nightmares I have now are different but revolve around the same theme, saving my baby. … Continue reading The Sun and the Ghost
Musings of a Birthmom: The Honest Ramblings of a First Mother 
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